The Things My Dad Said

Here is a little ditty I wrote for my “Go Ask Your Mother…a Father’s Story” show. Thought it would be appropriate to share this for Father’s Day. (Sung to the tune of “My Favorite Things” from The Sound of Music.)

THE THINGS MY DAD SAID

“Were you born in a barn?” and “For crying out loud”
“Because I said so” and “Don’t make a sound”
“You’ve got a roof over your head”
These are few of the things my dad said

“I’ll give you something to cry about”
“Let mom kiss it better” “You’ll live, don’t you pout”
“There are no monsters under your bed”
These are some more of the things my dad said

“Oh for Pete’s sake”
“Clean up your plate”
“Don’t wear stripes with plaid”
I find I’m repeating the things my dad said
And sometimes I think that’s sad

“Don’t make me come in there” “I’ve had it, bend over”
“I won’t say it again, I’ll pull this car over”
“Stop picking your nose, your brains will fall out”
These are the things I am talking about

“They jump off a cliff, would you do it too?”
“Say please, excuse me and don’t forget thank you”
“Go comb your hair” “don’t make a fuss”
“Close the barn door and remember to flush”

“Ask your mother”
“Pull my finger”
“You’re gonna make me mad”
I find I’m repeating the things my dad said
But I ask you is that so bad?